LA FUGIDA (IX ETAPA) ........ I DARRERA

Un relat de: MariaM
Aquest matí l’esmorzar ha estat més abundant i més nombrós, havíem de fer pocs quilòmetres i ningú tenia pressa; inclús ens costava de ser els primers en marxar. Hi ha hagut intercanvi d’adreces i telèfons i, naturalment, el propòsit de retrobar-nos. Me n’aniré amb aquesta idea; malgrat que el meu comportament hagi pogut semblar distant, el cas és que he arribat a apreciar als companys del grup, els he sentit molt propers, sobretot, després del meu conte d’ahir. Propers i discrets i cal que sigui així, ho diuen els experts, perquè són moltes hores i espais els que es comparteixen.
El relat vivencial d’ahir, ha estat bo pel grup; ha refermat alguns llaços i en mi ha fer créixer la confiança que em faltava. I em calia.
Quan hem arribat al cap d’avall de la jornada, a la porta de l’alberg me n’he endut un gran ensurt. Hi havia una ambulància i un cotxe aparcats i, també, un altre, de la policia de tràfic i, encercant-los, els espectadors que sovintegen en aquests casos, entre ells alguns de nosaltres. Curiosos els uns i, sobtadament esglaiada, jo mateixa. N’he tingut prou en veure la bicicleta groga penjant d’un arbre, prop del cotxe abonyegat, i marxar a corre-cuita.
M’he presentat al conductor de l’ambulància medicalitzada, just en el moment que dipositaven a l’interior la llitera amb el ferit. Duia mascareta, i el cap embenat, costava reconèixer-lo. Per molt que he insistit no m’han deixat que l’acompanyés; m’han fet fora, dient-me on el portaven, això sí.
Ràpidament, m’he precipitat a l’interior de l’alberg, he recollit el meu equipatge que ja havia arribat, i amb la mateixa acceleració, m’he acomiadat dels amics, neguitosa, però, molt segura del que anava a fer.
Mentre esperava el taxi que em portaria a l’hospital m’he assegut a la parada. No em podia estar de rememorar aquell capvespre de l’encontre. Anava a casa i creuava un pas de vianants; ell s’havia aturat per cedir el pas alhora que, en reconèixer-me, va obrir la porta per invitar-me a pujar.
En els primers moments, el silenci s’instal·là entre nosaltres, era la primera vegada que estàvem sols i l’espai era molt reduït. Havia somrigut abans de preguntar-m’ho: Què és l’amor per a tu? Crec que vaig posar-me com un tomàquet, però ell no esperava cap resposta. Possiblement, ho preguntava per encetar una conversa i trencar el silenci. Doncs, l’amor, continuà, és compartir una fulla de carxofa; saber fer-ho i voler fer-ho. Hi ha molt poca gent per la qual estaríem disposats a fer-ho. I aquest fou el detonant per esclafir a riure i relaxar-nos. Amb aquesta absurda rucada començà tot. Tot.
Per primera vegada a la vida, em vaig deixar anar; ignoro com em vaig trobar en una habitació desconeguda sense saber com hi havia anat a raure. Recordo, això sí, la lluna que ja havia fet camí fins a trobar-se just damunt dels nostres caps. Recordo, sobretot, la bellesa d’aquell cos que se m’oferia nu i resplendent i que jo rebia perdudament, amb passió, i amb bogeria. Després de l’explosió, possiblement durant un temps retinguda, ens va envair la calma, l’expressió de l’amor fet tendresa.
Aquest home, és l’home que em vaig trobar fent el Camino. És l’home de la bicicleta groga, el que durant uns dies el seu record m’ha trastornat. És qui m’ha donat la descripció de l’amor com mai ningú me l’havia fet, descripció i molt més.
Aquest és l’home que plorava al costat del nuvi el dia que anava a casar-me. Ell fou l’origen de la meva fugida, la causa de què hagués deixat palplantat, al peu de l’altar, a l’home amb qui anava a casar-me, el seu pare. Perquè, certament, ell és el seu fill.
Ha arribat el taxi; me n’he adonat perquè, des de dintre, m’han obert la porta invitant-me a pujar i jo tot d’una, amb la bossa a una mà i el puny tancat de l’altra, l’he emprés a cops damunt del seu pit, mentre ell intentava aturar-me tot dient-me: estimada sí que has tardat! I jo, rient i plorant alhora, no parava de dir-li que era un imbècil però quina sort que hagis vingut!
No ens hem quedat a l’alberg, hem aprofitat el taxi, mentre el conductor ens mirava perplex.
Els dos ens havíem refugiat en el Camino sense saber-ho i el Camino ha fet la resta. Ara l’acabem i en comencem un altre plegats.

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